For those of you who are "hardcore"

Just stop. You're not impressing anyone. Don't ruin your teenage years by trying to be a stupid little rocker chick\guy. Okay, you like rock music. Okay, you have an attitude problem. But do you have to advertise it? Come on, really. You grew up in the suburbs. Nobody feels sorry for you. A lot of the emo rockfan people claim to have the hardest lives with parents who just hate them sooo much... But you know... Most of the people who actually had\have hard lives are dealing with them, moving on, being happy. You should learn from them. By being a stupid little punk, all you're doing is giving yourself an excuse to be a smart-alec. Does that sound hardcore? No. That just sounds selfish. I have nothing against it being a style, as long as you don't take it overboard. But one thing I cannot stand is when people turn it into a state of mind. Think about it... Which is easier? To sulk, get attention from people, and not make any attempt to do anything about the situation that is making you sooo "miserable"? Or, to confront the problem head on, deal with it, get over it, take the time to do whatever it takes to make yourself happy? I'm thinking it isn't the latter. So, really, you aren't hardcore. You're taking the easy way out. Its easier to hate life and everyone in it. That's a simple, easy way to get attention and run away from your problems. Think about it.


-Shannz O(.-.)O

Me

Let me just clear something up, here. My current goal in life is to have a goal in life. I don't know what I want to do. The first step in figuring that part out, I think, is to figure out who I am and who I want to be in the future. Do I want to be a plastic barbie? Heh, I think not. Do I want to be an arrogant moron? That's a definite no. Honestly... The only thing I know at this point is what\who I don't want to be. Yeah, I know what my strengths are. I know what my weaknesses are. I know how I think, how my mind works... Sometimes at least. I can have these extremely deep thoughts, then when I want to write them down? My mind goes off into a million directions. It drives me insane but I know it also, in a way, is what fuels my creativity. A blessing and a curse? I have yet to figure that out. I'm figuring out what the most fulfilling things in my life are. I'm figuring out what I should cherish and what I should kick to the curb. I suppose I'm just... Finding that what I'm made of is stronger than I previously thought. And that I can simply say no to people and it won't completely devestate them or make something awkward (or awk-rawd as Dustin says). Life isn't me, life isn't you, but life might be us...



I love that moment of complete happiness you get sometimes. With a groupd of close friends, with your family, or both. Doing something you love, experiencing something that's just for yourself. Not worrying about anything else. Like for instance, when its at your favorite part of a really happy song. When you just want to get up and dance and sing into a hair brush, no matter who is looking. I don't live for it, but I'm addicted to it. Pure joy. That's the moment when nothing matters. People still look at you like you're crazy, but that doesn't seem to matter anymore. Their judgements are shut out of your mind, and you just do whatever you want. You want to share it with everyone somehow, you want to wear a banner on your head that says "I'M HAPPY!"


I love my family. My mom: the biggest inspiration in my life. She shows me, no matter what happens to me, life goes on. I will be happy. I will find the love of my life. I could have the worst day possible, I could feel yucky and sick and have frizzy hair and no makeup on but she makes me feel on top of the world. My dad: He's just a big kid at heart. He always makes me laugh, just by doing the smallest things. He's so much fun to be around and I love him to death. My brother: Larger than life. The guy all my friends have crushes on. The guy who has a lot of friends. The guy with awesome hair. The guy I look up to. He shows me that hard work is the best way to earn respect from people. I love him.


I love my friends. Dustin: YOUUUU!!! He is, hands down, the funniest person I know. Guy or girl. He makes me laugh harder than any of my other friends. He can be serious too. He cheers me up when I'm sad, he respects me, he's my BESSSSSSSSST FRIIIIIIIIIEND. AND I LOVVVVVVVE HIMMMMMMMM (sorry, that's a song). We've been best friends since October, I think. I don't know what I'd do without him. Noah: Well, well. We've had some rough spots in our relationship now haven't we? You breaking up with me? ...Twice? But that's beside the point. Through it all, you've been an amazing friend. And now, you're more like a brother. I really do love you (not in that way), and I wish you well. I hope you have the great life you deserve. And you need to call me dangit! Amanda (a.k.a Mander): MANDER YOU ROCK!!! I love you I love you I love you xD you're so funny. You're one of the only girls that I think is a lot like me. We just click, we get along realllllllly well. ILY. xD


I love Aaron. Since we've been together I really have been happier. He's the sweetest, most adorable guy I know. He doesn't try to be anyone else. He's totally real. That's something you don't find often. When I say I love him, I don't say it just because every other couple does. I say it because I feel it. He's so patient. And down to earth. I love every little thing about him. He's so completely honest with me, but he isn't mean at all... Ah, he's just so amazing. No words can describe him. He's my cookie monster!


I love life. :]


And I love figuring myself out. I really do. Its a new adventure every day. I find something new out about myself all the time. I'll never have myself figured out, because I'm constantly changing. And that... Is a beautiful thing.


I'm not trying to be deep, I'm not trying to be poetic. I'm not trying to be an angst-tastic teenager full of issues. I'm just saying what's on my mind today. Got a problem with it? Well, that's super-dee-duper! Read something else.


-Shannz

O(.-.)O